Children's accounts - yay or nay?

On Monday I attended a workshop with Mumsnet and Barclay's Bank to help the bank "understand parents and families better". When they called me, they promised a day filled with fun, food and great people. To say I was coping well prior to going would be a flat out lie. I was terrified. You see, it had all the making of an actual nightmare for me - going to a place I don't know, full with people I don't know, without Hidai (also known in these situation as my security blanket, or the one who can actually remember his name when asked), to talk in front of other people, about banking. And of course they said there might be a filming crew. And interviews. Banks are not my strong suit. At the risk of sounding like a complete idiot, banks terrify me. If I can avoid all things bank-related I will. I will go to extreme length to do so in fact. I can count on one hand the numbers of times I've been in the bank by myself, I don't know how to log in to our account online, and every time I have to deal with something relating to my business account I get petrified. Yes, I don't do well with banks. Now please don't ask how I am with handling HMRC.
Why did I go then? I did have a few very good reasons, not including the mini-sandwiches they promised. Firstly I was hoping to convince the Barclay's people that a pink website with flowers will be less intimidating than the current one, where every time I log in I get a warning - pay your mortgage or your house will be reclaimed. I don't even have a mortgage with Barclay's...
Secondly, in a sharp contrast to the picture I portrayed just a millisecond ago, I am very much an equal partner when it comes to all our money decisions (even if it has more to do with Hidai insisting and less with free choice), so I do have pretty strong opinions about money and banking, thirdly because I really wanted to convince them to add a budget tool (or app) to their bank website, and to save me the trouble of logging everything manually when they already have the data in their system (sorry Toshl people. You have a great app, it's not against you).
So I said yes, and set down with Hidai to learn everything I don't know about our bank. I came with notes. Nobody else in my group had notes.
A bit embarrassing. But less than the fact that I also came with a notepad.
The mini sandwiches saved the day.
I am going to surprise you all here, and tell you that I did not fuck up. I had a great day, I talked to people, I spoke about all my ideas (okay, I did not mention the pink website one), I even presented the online thing to everyone. It was indeed filled with great people, ideas, food and fun. I even interviewed. For some reason unclear to me. I owe it all to Claire from Tesco that I managed to do it all in one take (or maybe that's because they will cut me out of the film).
But the thing I found most fascinating was the way people educate their children about money. Because Barclay's wanted "to help with our kids", the most prominent subject that emerged was financial education. Children's financial education, and how the bank can help with that.
I admit, I never thought the bank could help with the education of my children, financial or otherwise, but what I found even more confusing than that was the concept of "children's bank account". As it emerged from Monday, my poor little kids are the only two in the whole of the UK who don't have a bank account. When the subject first arose in the group I figured they were talking Long-term saving accounts, which we do have. But I gradually came to realise that children at the age of 5 are supposed to have a bank account for "their money". Children at the age of 5 are supposed to have money. Of their own. Okay so I get why a teenager will want to have money of their own and buy things that their parents deem too expensive or right down silly, but a five years old? I don't get it.
To be honest, I struggle with the subject of financial education. How do you teach children to be "good with money"? what is "good with money"anyway?  I think being "good with money" depends on your whole outlook on life, and what place "having money" have in it. Is money a mean or an end? The problem with money is that it is not "just money", it's much more than that, it's emotional, it's scars we carry with us from childhood, it's irrational fear of banks, it's a security blanket, it's a way to gain power and control over people, it's a lot of things that have nothing to do with the actual number printed on the coin (or note).
We all choose our own way of dealing with the issue of money, but it baffles me why we expect our kids, and some where talking even toddlers, to "save money in a bank account"? Save for what? I don't understand why kids need to worry about money. Kids should be kids. At least when they are five they should. Kids should get presents, not buy them. Kids shouldn't be worried about how much money there is in their (or their parents) bank accounts, or about real and fake designer things, or about how we'll pay the rent. Why are we in such a hurry all the time to make our children grow up faster than they do? They will have so much of their lives to have to stand on their own two feet. Why should they be expected to do that when they are five? or eight?
I don't mean be oblivious to everything. But there must be a middle ground, where you can explain about these things but still make your child feel that it's really not his issue yet. I tell Ron, if you want something, ask for it. He doesn't get everything he wants, for some he waits till Christmas or his birthday, and others I say I will try, but I can't promise (like the trip to Paris). I want him to be able to enjoy these precious years, where he doesn't need to worry about anything.
I don't give them pocket money. There is nothing my kids need or want that five pounds a week will get them, and I don't really go for the whole paying for chores because I was brought up believing that the house is a community that we all are responsible for, and also I think if I send out into the world two boys who know how to do laundry, dishes and meals, I should be paid for it. Not them. And a bit more seriously, obsessing about money (which is what will happen if my kids have any) isn't the way to being "good with money" in my book. I know a lot of people don't agree, I saw it on Monday (where I went with the flow, mainly because the idea of making a super-children's-account won us the competition and we got chocolate. And you know how I am with chocolate). They say it's good for the kids to learn to wait, to be patient, to delay gratification. I say sure, but first we adults should learn all these things.
I don't know how to teach my kids about money. I am not as good with it as I sometimes wish I was. I am not a good saver, I hate budgets, I am terrified of banks, I am afraid my kids will go without, or feel responsible for things that are not their responsibility, I have plenty of my own childhood scars, and so does Hidai (though his are different).
But I do believe in two things - unless it comes with you leading by example, kids will usually not learn the lesson you try to teach them, because do as I say and not as I do never works (unless you hide the chocolate really well), and that everything in life comes with a price tag, and you just choose the one you are willing or able to pay.