August 15, 2013

Dreadful Days

It started as a joke really. I wrote a post for my friend Jane's great linky "Small Steps - Amazing Achievements", a linky that celebrates our children's achievements every week. I aptly named my post Positivity is Overrated and stated that what I bring to the table, my blogging strengths if you will, are cynicism, self-deprecation & complaints. Jane, being the nice person that she is, did not ban me from ever returning. And people started responding with a"save me a place at your linky".
I went on to write a few more depressingly honest posts about life, loneliness and the lie of the "perfect", and people still continued to say there should be a place for this kind of posts.
To be honest, I am not really sure what "this kind of posts" these posts are. Are they about the lows we sink to when raising the kids? Are they about the tough days we go through with Special children? Are they about how hard our lives are? How guilty we feel? About all the ways we feel we fail our children, or partners, ourselves? I guess they are all this and more.
Life is complicated. Parenting is complicated. We all try to look on the bright side most times, to be upbeat, to be positive, to believe that everything is for the best. Most of the time it works just fine, and we skip along and enjoy life. But every once in a while, well, it seems like the sh*^&^t hits the fan, the other shoe drops and life just sits there and laugh at you. Every once in a while you have a dreadful day.
There are so many linkys out there looking for the bright and happy things in life, wanting to record all that is good and motivating. I applaud them, I love them, I link to them. But life isn't just those moments and days, and there should be a place for the other feelings. You can't, you shouldn't bottle it all inside and pretend it's not there. You should have a place to let it all out, and to know that you will get an ear to listen, a shoulder to lean on, and a hug.
I want this linky to be this place.

I do have a few rules for this linky -
1. Link whatever you want, old or new, about anything you want. Except the sentence "I know there are people worse off than me". Yes, there probably are. But it doesn't mean you don't have a right to feel bad about your things.
2. Don't judge others. Everyone has a different dreadful day. Even if it is having to do laundry.
3. There is no place for patronising, belittling, or meanness. No "you should be grateful for what you have", no "other people have bigger problems" and no "I swear I love my kids".
4. Please visit other people and comment. We are here for the love and support.
5. Have fun :)

Life isn't just rose-coloured. It's multi-coloured. Seeing, acknowledging and loving all the colours doesn't make you negative. It just means you're not colour-blind.

Dreadful Days, Orli Just Breathe

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